Do you poo in the loo?

[Chriso]

Just wanted other peoples thoughts on this sticky subject.
Just recently my in-laws gave the missus and I their old porta-loo (it's not a POTTI!) as it was too big for their caravan.
I was a bit dubious in using this contraption as, being a man and all, like a bear, I thought it was my duty to sh#t in the woods.
10 years in the Army finding a straining post in the field to relieve yourself against whilst keeping an ever watchful eye out for those damn Musorian Armed Forces from the 101st Raider Battallion (any AJ's will know what I am talking about) conditioned me to crapping in the field.
But last year whilst camped on Straddie, before the porta-loo came into my life, whilst going for my morning walk up into the dunes whilst dodging the mine field of poo tickets, I stepped into what everyone dreds, A SURFACE LAID POO!
When I thought back to this unfortunate incident whilst contemplating whether or not to use this piece of civilisation, the environmentalist in me kicked in and convinced me to use it instead of adding to the mounds of faeces buried around popular campsites.
The one thing that dissapointed me was that there is not always somewhere to dump the dump; for example, Fraser Island does not have a dump site, you have to wait untill you get over to Rainbow Beach to the dump site there. And believe me after ten days camped on Fraser, stuff mounts up.
It is strange that the NPWS want you to take nothing but photographs and leave nothing but footprints and faeces on Fraser!

[oldcourier]

LMAO. I know all about those damn Musorians! :D So far everywhere I have camped has been on properties where limited numbers of people go. Therefor You can find a good crapping spot away from the creeks and ant mounds that hasn't been flogged to death by ten thousand other epople who coiuldn't hold on anymore. All this said, I think I would probably try to take a port-a-loo if I was heading to Fraser Is, or any heavily populated camping spot!

[dirtygq]

i had one break when i picked it up(porta loo)....not nice but yeah ,polly waffles on the ground is just plain dirty as least bury the thing ang go for a good walk into the bush when you do.

[Trojan]

for example, Fraser Island does not have a dump site, you have to wait untill you get over to Rainbow Beach to the dump site there. And believe me after ten days camped on Fraser, stuff mounts up.
It is strange that the NPWS want you to take nothing but photographs and leave nothing but footprints and faeces on Fraser!

QPWS state you should dig a 50cm deep hole and take a dump in that, to help stop Dingoes from digging them up.

[Lynchie]

I'm finding this thread so hard to read with all the tears in my eyes. You guys are crackin me up:eek: :eek: :D :D.

[nqgu]

While it may not be good advice to signal your position to the Musorians by burning your poo tickets. This should be standard practice. Your poo pack should contain a butane torch or somethig similar.

Oh don't light the spinifex http://www.4wdmonthly.com.au/forum/images/icons/icon10.gif

[marvic]

We camped up the Howqua River Rd couple years ago, no place to go with the amount of people there. Couple of long drops or the porta potty, most people all had their own toilet tent things. Now I don't mind long drops BUT I do like to breath while I'm there.

[BMKal]

And if you do get a porta-loo, make sure you use the right chemical in it. Had one years ago and the handbrake went into the hardware store in Alice Springs to get some of that chemical that "breaks down" the contents. She ended up coming back with formaldehyde. Put that in the potty and it "pickled" the contents. Thought she may have wanted to keep some for posterity.

[Jeepster]

Saw plenty of dudes go the "aqua bog" at Moreton a couple of years ago due to cramped and well used camp areas ........

don't swim with your mouth open.....

[campdog]

Any good camping spot on Cape york is littered with toilet paper and stinks to high heaven mid dry season. Like walking through a mine field at Archer River arond august.

[deano180]

lmao as well,struck a bit of a mine field when we camped at 9 mile beach after chrissy,the worst ones are only just covered so it definately puts a new meaning to 'tread lightly'.
bury em as deep as possible is my motto:)

[dirtygq]

Any good camping spot on Cape york is littered with toilet paper and stinks to high heaven mid dry season. Like walking through a mine field at Archer River arond august.
Typical of others ruining it for the fellow campers,when we camped at moreton i dug a hole over a metre deep for our porta waste .Not hard at all to do.

[crawla]

Any good camping spot on Cape york is littered with toilet paper and stinks to high heaven mid dry season. Like walking through a mine field at Archer River arond august.

they're pigs mate, archer river is easy as to dig a deep hole and use. It's plain disrespect for the environment.

[FJ40.]

QPWS state you should dig a 50cm deep hole and take a dump in that, to help stop Dingoes from digging them up.

its a good theiry and i try to put it into practise
but when you gotta go you gotta go
and a 30cm hole is hell deep in times like that

[gohard60]

its not too hard now is it, dig a deep hole and then burn you paper in the hole (so that the wildlife doesnt dig it up and spread it around) then fill your hole in nothing worse than going to a lovely remote area and seeing used toilet paper around the bush

[Eddy]

Porta potty is the only way to go (sorry) for me now with buggered knee.
But I like it now, stuff is already well obn the way to being broken down by the time ya gotta bury it, so the "yerrch" factor is reduced considerable.

And much easier to dig one hole at the end of a weekend than one or two each everyday:cool:

Also makes it easier for others to find a burial site too.

[4.2GUst]

we learnt after the first trip of using the portaloo or chemical toilet just put in alittle more chemical so the dry reach factor isnt that high!!

[Trojan]

its a good theiry and i try to put it into practise
but when you gotta go you gotta go
and a 30cm hole is hell deep in times like that

You can always do your business, then dig the hole next to it. Use the shovel to push it into the hole, then backfill.

[FireTroll]

QPWS state you should dig a 50cm deep hole and take a dump in that, to help stop Dingoes from digging them up.

Somebody help meeeeee a dingo just ate my bowel baby


hahahahahahahahaaaaahhhhhaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!

[Mikes F250]

I can't believe the 101st Raider Battalion is still going??, we wiped them out years ago!!....sorry what was the question? I remember one of the diggers in the battalion who was the son of the big wigs, who had failed recruit course & every other course, his only job in the army was to mark foul ground, i guess he was in the poo if he screwed up

[Baldy1]

When we bush camp we dig a deep hole that'll do us for the 3 nights or so. Basically, 1 hole per car. After each use, we just leave the fold-up dunny seat set up over it and the shovel across it, after putting a layer of dirt over the doings and burning the paper. Ready to go in an emergency then.
I have been thinking of the porta dunny though.
So when you guys are packing up, you empty the contents in a hole and bury or would you take it home and pour it in the dunny?

Cheers

[dirtygq]

i dig a hole over a metre deep when posiible and bury it b4 leaving ,i would hate to be hit in the back of the head by a porta potti in a crash......ewwwww:eek:

[mrbishi]

haha this thread is great - had a good laugh.

Those portaloos have always intruiged me - I can't imagine emptying them or cleaning them to be very pleasant !

Cheers,
Jon

[dirtygq]

no if used properly they are non smelly

[mrbishi]

So how exactly do they work? - you do your business then add some sort of chemical that starts breaking down and neutralises the waste? How much do they store and how often do you have to empty them?

Cheers,
Jon

[bigjedd]

Most porta loos have 2 halves the top half is what you sit on. This area is molded to the shape of a toilet seat and is also a water container with a hand pump to flush the bowl with. The bottom half is the container for the waste to collect in. Between the 2 halves there is a slide which allows the waste to be sealed of from the top bit. To use the system u first of all tip some chemical into the bottom half then close the slide when you finish doing your bit you pump a bit of water into the top half and then pull the slide and hey presto all falls into bottom half close the slide and the chemicals start to do their thing just like a septic tank only smaller.

You need to keep an eye on how much is in the bottom tank and empty it out if it is too full.

[GOIN BUSH]

Mate I Just Take My Post Hole Auger,and Dig A Bloody Deep Hole,once Shes Half Full Throw In A Match Fill It In And Drill Another.theres Nothing Worse Than Shit Paper And Turds All Over This Wonderful Country Of Ours.

[mucktruck]

Bahabahabaha ouch! my ribs hurt from BahaBaha:D :D man this on is top reading even tho it took me a couple of go's to get through it.

[Corindi]

How much do they store and how often do you have to empty them?

Cheers,
Jon

I think ours is 12 litres. Takes 2 girls about 4 days to fill it. I have learnt that when they say it's getting full, not to hesitate because when it is over full it's messy. There is hardly any smell because of the chemicals.

I don't back out into it myself because my craps are too long and before I can snap one off it reaches the bottom. I originally thought that is what the slide part was for but after a few days realised i had it all wrong.

[nqgu]

I think ours is 12 litres. Takes 2 girls about 4 days to fill it. I have learnt that when they say it's getting full, not to hesitate because when it is over full it's messy. There is hardly any smell because of the chemicals.

I don't back out into it myself because my craps are too long and before I can snap one off it reaches the bottom. I originally thought that is what the slide part was for but after a few days realised i had it all wrong.

Which reminds me...why does your poo taper at the end?












....So your bum doesn't shut with a bang!
http://www.4wdmonthly.com.au/forum/images/icons/icon10.gif

[woolgoolgaoffroad]

Which reminds me...why does your poo taper at the end?





....So your bum doesn't shut with a bang!
http://www.4wdmonthly.com.au/forum/images/icons/icon10.gif
my stomach is hurting from laughing..........:D

[Jeeps]

I don't back out into it myself because my craps are too long and before I can snap one off it reaches the bottom. I originally thought that is what the slide part was for but after a few days realised i had it all wrong.



HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHA !!!

[Harb]

I don't back out into it myself because my craps are too long and before I can snap one off it reaches the bottom. I originally thought that is what the slide part was for but after a few days realised i had it all wrong.

http://img239.imageshack.us/img239/1825/cryingwithlaughterjg9.gifhttp://img239.imageshack.us/img239/1825/cryingwithlaughterjg9.gifhttp://img239.imageshack.us/img239/1825/cryingwithlaughterjg9.gif
http://img239.imageshack.us/img239/1825/cryingwithlaughterjg9.gifhttp://img239.imageshack.us/img239/1825/cryingwithlaughterjg9.gifhttp://img239.imageshack.us/img239/1825/cryingwithlaughterjg9.gif

.

[BEU77Y]

This thread is the best!!! I have had the best laugh I've had in ages - thanks guys!

[bravoboy]

Saw plenty of dudes go the "aqua bog" at Moreton a couple of years ago due to cramped and well used camp areas ........

don't swim with your mouth open.....

No wonder we've been getting good fish from the beach, sounds like a pretty good berley trail

[Dogsta]

Just found this thread, Shit (pardon the pun) it's funny can't stop laughing.

[crawla]

I remember heading up north of Sydney about 6 years ago for the easter weekend. The camp ground had about 5 porta loos for the extra campers over this period, they seriously under estimated. On the Sunday morning I lined up with women, children, grandpas etc for the morning ritual. Nothing could prepare me for what I was about to see.....nothing!

I walked in the porta and was instantly hit with a 15 degree temp rise and instantly started to sweat in the stench.....well it was no bloody wonder.....I lifted the toilet seat up and thought out loudly......SHIT! There must have been 200 turds piled up to within an inch of overflowing, you would have risked hitting the old scrote on one if you sat down!!!! I still have the image burnt permanently into my memory and will be there for life!! Thank god most portaloos are the flushing ones these days!

Give me a well dug clean hole anyday!

[Trojan]

Just found this thread, Shit (pardon the pun) it's funny can't stop laughing.

Well lets continue with some random tales of the poo :D

I was working in a Nursing Home, wandering around looking at things on the ceiling (job related). Walked into a bathroom and got a nice squishy feeling as i put my foot down.

Now i have stood in various excrement of various animals in the past, but that one simply tops the lot. The stench overcome me, the thought of what i just stood in overcome me, i have never vomited and dry reached continuously for such a length of time in my entire life. It looked like a big pile of that dry dog food that you mix with water, it wasn't solid, but it wasn't liquid either and was easily a week or twos worth of bowel movements because of the amount.

Just typing this is making my stomach turn from the memories.

[Chriso]

Well I am glad everyone is having a good old laugh :D .
I must say that amongst the sh*t on this thread there is some informative cr*p as well.
Remember this...If the toilet paper lingers...be a sport and use your fingers! This will prevent the random confetti like deposits of poo tickets around local campsites. In some places it looks as though a wedding has just taken place.
Here is another thing to ponder whilst on the popular discussion of bodily functions...Those bottles of popular fizzy drink that you see on the side of the road every now and then with what appears to be a not so fizzy yellowish coloured liquid.
My question; has anyone utilised this popular method of relieving themselves whilst in transit.
I remember once after consuming copious quantities of caffeine and driving from Brisbane to the Gold Coast in peak time of the afternoon with nowhere to turn off, no facilities and travelling at a snail's pace, I was Busting for a P*ss. I looked over to the passenger side floor and saw the answer...an empty water bottle. Without going into too much detail I can say that without a doubt it was one of the most difficult things to acheive. I do not understand how anyone in a sitting poistion can relieve themselves into such a recepticle without:
a. spilling it everywhere,
b. suffering from overflow,
c. loosing control of vehicle,
d. loosing control of your appendage, and
e. having the bottle securely fastened to forementioned appendage.
Any other thoughts on this subject my fellow forumites:cool:

[dhula]

The MAF knows where we are now as we no longer dig shit pits or pissaphones.

We tow a porta loo behind and line them all up in pretty lines for all to see.

[GOIN BUSH]

Well I am glad everyone is having a good old laugh :D .
I must say that amongst the sh*t on this thread there is some informative cr*p as well.
Remember this...If the toilet paper lingers...be a sport and use your fingers! This will prevent the random confetti like deposits of poo tickets around local campsites. In some places it looks as though a wedding has just taken place.
Here is another thing to ponder whilst on the popular discussion of bodily functions...Those bottles of popular fizzy drink that you see on the side of the road every now and then with what appears to be a not so fizzy yellowish coloured liquid.
My question; has anyone utilised this popular method of relieving themselves whilst in transit.
I remember once after consuming copious quantities of caffeine and driving from Brisbane to the Gold Coast in peak time of the afternoon with nowhere to turn off, no facilities and travelling at a snail's pace, I was Busting for a P*ss. I looked over to the passenger side floor and saw the answer...an empty water bottle. Without going into too much detail I can say that without a doubt it was one of the most difficult things to acheive. I do not understand how anyone in a sitting poistion can relieve themselves into such a recepticle without:
a. spilling it everywhere,
b. suffering from overflow,
c. loosing control of vehicle,
d. loosing control of your appendage, and
e. having the bottle securely fastened to forementioned appendage.
Any other thoughts on this subject my fellow forumites:cool:
all the truckies use gatoraide bottles,they have a bigger opening(you may need 2 though)never tried it myself.but i know some that have.:eek:

[sco_aus]

HAHAHA! After losing every time, you would think the Musorians would give up, but you gotta hand it to them, they just keep trying. I wanna know why they wear desert cams in Australia? :D
On topic, theres nothing more emotional than finding a good spot in the woods, digging a hole and going hell for leather :D

(PS. ex army and the troopie are purely a coincidence :D)

[BMKal]

all the truckies use gatoraide bottles,they have a bigger opening(you may need 2 though)never tried it myself.but i know some that have.:eek:

Don't know if you get them over east, but the small flavoured milk bottles with the wide neck and larger opening are popular amongst the truckies over here. Personally, I think that even these are a bit small. Now a pickle jar .................

[LANDCRUSHER]

QPWS state you should dig a 50cm deep hole and take a dump in that, to help stop Dingoes from digging them up.

WHAT?????? a dingo stole your poo

[territorian1]

No room for a porta loo in my rig. I like Jimmy's Thunderbox that I found in the shop at Innaminka a few years back. The old wooden loo and folds up nice and flat. Dig a nice deep hole, line the loo with a garbage bag (don't forget to cut the bottom out of the bag) and sit it over the hole. Shove the loo paper through the handle on the spade dug in to the ground or situate near a tree with a branch in the right place. And you can even bring a copy of 4WD Monthly to read in comfort. When you move on drop the garbage bag in and drop a match down before filling in the hole. And Jimmy's Thunderbox folds flat and goes in its bag to store behind the 4by's seat.

[THE D3]

Ahhh some great stories there :) . Yep we have a porta potty, a definate as far as I am concerned with 3 children aged from 4-10, oh and myself of course. Just have to make sure it is at back of the "ensuite" as I have sat down before, trying to zip it up, and ended up feet out side head pushed against the material and then a bugger to start wiping. I usually get the boys to tinkle on mother nature but the young girl prefers the potty and all no 2's go in. Last trip to Fraser lasted 3 days before I had to dig a metre or so hole and emptied the contents, oh thats a joy, just make sure you have the sunnies on. Burn it and fill it back up again. It aint home but it sure is a pretty good replacement. Oh one other bit of advice is if you have the ensuite set up and loo inside try to go at the "cooler" times of the day, not such much as for smell as the chemicals do a good job, moreso its pretty "crap" excuse the pun to be dumping a big load whilst sweating your arse off :eek:

Regards

Stevo

[Googy]

Don't ya just love those spots where just sit there in peace and watch the world go by and don't have to worry about giving some poor mother and kids psycho problems when they see some poor bugger straining and sweating giving birth to a greenie.

[PajDID]

Go the Jimmys thunderbox, had mine nearly 3 years, 12 or so camping trips so far and never let me down, quite comfortable for those times when deep in thought and easy to pack away and keep clean.

[Googy]

Go the Jimmys thunderbox, had mine nearly 3 years, 12 or so camping trips so far and never let me down, quite comfortable for those times when deep in thought and easy to pack away and keep clean.

I must look into one. what I mean to say is at one

[PajDID]

trying to post my first ever pic. hope it works

[jedsute]

it works nice view from the pew too

[griz]

I've got a Jimmy's Thunderbox. Easy to use and easy to pack.

[Googy]

trying to post my first ever pic. hope it works

Yup I could poo there.

[landcrusier ute]

bush bog for me boys i have paer under my seat ready for the next one and when i am at the beach i water bog it

[GOIN BUSH]

bush bog for me boys i have paer under my seat ready for the next one and when i am at the beach i water bog it
what happens if its a wet water bog and ends up in ya back hair,not for me im afraid just dig a hole man.

[landcrusier ute]

poo with the currenet and you have no problems

[Googy]

bush bog for me boys i have paer under my seat ready for the next one and when i am at the beach i water bog it

No fair

we got croc, stingers & sharks stuff that

[tully]

no offense mate ,I think you would need a rather large porta potti . :D because you are full of it.
ha ha guess who.:confused:

[Googy]

no offense mate ,I think you would need a rather large porta potti . :D because you are full of it.
ha ha guess who.:confused:

I can tell by the picture so get back to work

[yogi_td80]

fark ............ water bog ............. can't think of anything worse !!!! do it in the sand nice and deep not in my shower :(

[Michi]

no if used properly they are non smelly

How long does it take (and what chemicals are you using) until the solids are disolved? I've tried different chemicals (with and w/out formaldehyd) but after a week or so it's still been a "hard" job to empty the bottom container.

Cheers

Michi

[rumpig]

no need to rough it to much when your away, we dig a hole and leave the sand outside the toilet tent so you can put a shovel full back in the hole when your done. the timber box has hinges on all 4 corners and piano hinge on both middle pieces so it folds flat, and the lid is on a removable peice of ply that sits on top. we have a sand spear to wash it all down before it gets packed away into a bag for the trip home.

[Moorey]

It didn't happen without pictures. I always take a pic of my worthy outdoor poos for posterity....hell, even some of the indoor ones..... :-)

[Low 1st]

It didn't happen without pictures. I always take a pic of my worthy outdoor poos for posterity....hell, even some of the indoor ones..... :-)


I think you should seek counselling. Thats disgusting. Do you print them out, and line your toilet walls with them?:mad:

[Moorey]

I think you should seek counselling. Thats disgusting. Do you print them out, and line your toilet walls with them?:mad:
FFS, dude, get over yourself, really.....at what point does poo go from eye wateringly hilarious, to repulsively disgusting.....show me the line......I'll step up to it.....may even cross it......but I'm not forcing you to sniff it or handle it....(insert eye roll emoticon)
If you're really interested in what i do with them, PM me your Mobie number (winking emoticon)

[Low 1st]

FFS, dude, get over yourself, really.....at what point does poo go from eye wateringly hilarious, to repulsively disgusting.....show me the line......I'll step up to it.....may even cross it......but I'm not forcing you to sniff it or handle it....(insert eye roll emoticon)
If you're really interested in what i do with them, PM me your Mobie number (winking emoticon)


Err....no thanks. I'm sure there is a Forum out there, somewhere, with like minded people for you to call and compare your business.

So, you think its normal to photograph the aftermath? Put it this way, there are 20 million people in this country, crapping daily.....do you think there are 20,000,000 new poo photos each day? I think you are on your own with your hobby.

[Moorey]

Err....no thanks. I'm sure there is a Forum out there, somewhere, with like minded people for you to call and compare your business.

So, you think its normal to photograph the aftermath? Put it this way, there are 20 million people in this country, crapping daily.....do you think there are 20,000,000 new poo photos each day? I think you are on your own with your hobby.

You're living in a dream world, friend.
But I'll be sure to keep an eye our for your funny bone....
Still waiting for you to point out this 'line' that isn't to be crossed....Wink

[Low 1st]

Still waiting for you to point out this 'line' that isn't to be crossed....Wink

Probably the point where you stop to admire and photograph it, rather than flush it. Do you archive the photos, and catalogue them according to what you ate the day before?

Do you have a reason for doing what you do, or is it more of a compulsion? Now, I'm curious.:)

[Rogue Patrol]

I don't back out into it myself because my craps are too long and before I can snap one off it reaches the bottom. I originally thought that is what the slide part was for but after a few days realised i had it all wrong.


Should we call you Mr Whippy......:cry:

[Moorey]

Probably the point where you stop to admire and photograph it, rather than flush it. Do you archive the photos, and catalogue them according to what you ate the day before?

Do you have a reason for doing what you do, or is it more of a compulsion? Now, I'm curious.:)


Not generally, but there was one of note after a fine meal at a mates wedding. Great food, greater result...ha ha.:)
Some poo's ere funny, simple as that. Every man grew up knowing it. ;)

[Rogue Patrol]

Not generally, but there was one of note after a fine meal at a mates wedding. Great food, greater result...ha ha.:)
Some poo's ere funny, simple as that. Every man grew up knowing it. ;)


:cry: :cry: Stop it, it hurts.....:cry: :cry:

[Low 1st]

Not generally, but there was one of note after a fine meal at a mates wedding. Great food, greater result...ha ha.:)
Some poo's ere funny, simple as that. Every man grew up knowing it. ;)


This is what you remember the most important day of their lives by?:crazy:

:p

[Moorey]

Should we call you Mr Whippy......:cry:

Sure, why not.....maybe even 'whippy-snapper' ;)

[Moorey]

This is what you remember the most important day of their lives by?:crazy:

:p

I got a pic of the ceremony too :)

[Low 1st]

I got a pic of the ceremony too :)

Which one made the album though?:D

[Moorey]

Which one made the album though?:D
I've got 2 albums....eye roll.... ;)

[Rogue Patrol]

I've got 2 albums....eye roll.... ;)


Number 1 and Number 2?

[Moorey]

Number 1 and Number 2?

There's nothing funny about wee ......



















I like your work ;)

[b bear]

There's nothing funny about wee ......



Yeah there is.. You can write your name in the sand, up a tree, on your ex's door handle, and amny other places...

that can be funny...

[Rogue Patrol]

Yeah there is.. You can write your name in the sand, up a tree, on your ex's door handle, and amny other places...

that can be funny...


And NEVER EVER eat yellow snow......

[Low 1st]

Yeah there is.. You can write your name in the sand, up a tree, on your ex's door handle, and amny other places...

that can be funny...


Not when your name is Christopher Anthony Pantalopolous.:(

[b bear]

Not when your name is Christopher Anthony Pantalopolous.:(

lol, you could try C.A.P. Wanna buy an R ????

[Low 1st]

lol, you could try C.A.P. Wanna buy an R ????


The full stops take a fair bit of self control.:)

[Baldricks_Mate]

It didn't happen without pictures. I always take a pic of my worthy outdoor poos for posterity....hell, even some of the indoor ones..... :-)


OMG it's Kenny !!! What are you doing here,now that your'e a movie star?

[Marc 1]

OMG it's Kenny !!! What are you doing here,now that your'e a movie star?

Wasn't it Mr Hanky? This forum is proof that just when you thought we've reached rock bottom, its always possible to go lower!! Geez my ribs hurt from laughing:D :D :D

[Rogue Patrol]

HAHAHAHAHAHA, Mr hanky.......

U wanna talk about rock bottom.....remember when they tried eating in reverse.....

[Biohazard]

haha eat with ur ass kids, it better for u roflmao

and the celebrity cheif that eats a whole christmas turkey with her ass lol
hahahahahaha

[KRUZIN]

:waycool:...:thumb:...:D:D:D:D

[Moorey]

Yeah there is.. You can write your name in the sand, up a tree, on your ex's door handle, and amny other places...

that can be funny...

Don't forget in your friends bitchy girlfriends coke.....True story ;)

[Moorey]

OMG it's Kenny !!! What are you doing here,now that your'e a movie star?
Shane Jacobson to you....Shhhhhhh!

[locoman]

We had a Sarge in the army and while he was sittin' we hid behind a bush and slid a long handled shovel beneath his nether region and pinched what he had done.................geez it was funny with him looking at the stained paper but NO pollywaffle. We all do look to see what we did, dont we?

[Rogue Patrol]

We had a Sarge in the army and while he was sittin' we hid behind a bush and slid a long handled shovel beneath his nether region and pinched what he had done.................geez it was funny with him looking at the stained paper but NO pollywaffle. We all do look to see what we did, dont we?

Of course, we ALL take pride in our accomplishments.......:thumb:

[Moorey]

Finally, some recognition of the splendour and beauty that is our poo.
I don't care for anyone elses, but mine are a work of art worthy of recording and sharing on accasions... ;-)

[corhijas]

we use a porta potti for the kids and missus when we go away,i hate emptying the damn thing but as long as the right chemicals are used it does'nt smell too bad,good thing is you can stop at some out of the way public toilets etc or there are some dumping stations and empty them when you need too.

[orejap]

trying to post my first ever pic. hope it works

Reminds me of a girl I used to know. "Womb with a view"

[Bruceh]

Finally, some recognition of the splendour and beauty that is our poo.
I don't care for anyone elses, but mine are a work of art worthy of recording and sharing on accasions... ;-)

BWHAHAHAHAHA :p

[Faavil]

I remember camping about 150klms off-road and out from 3-ways (NT) many years back...couldn't even drive a tent peg in-leave out trying to dig a crapper. We shat on newspaper that next morning and put our parcels in plastic bags; to be deposited at the 3-ways servo when we arrived. The smell went through everything (at least it seemed to!) so we thought about an alternative for the return trip-we did the newspaper thing and threw it in the 'stoked-up' breaky fire...DO NOT DO THIS! the smelly smoke!!! I can still remember it!!

[micbec]

Careful what you tread in

http://www.users.bigpond.net.au/micbec/images/PICT10080012.jpg

[Rogue Patrol]

I remember camping about 150klms off-road and out from 3-ways (NT) many years back...couldn't even drive a tent peg in-leave out trying to dig a crapper. We shat on newspaper that next morning and put our parcels in plastic bags; to be deposited at the 3-ways servo when we arrived. The smell went through everything (at least it seemed to!) so we thought about an alternative for the return trip-we did the newspaper thing and threw it in the 'stoked-up' breaky fire...DO NOT DO THIS! the smelly smoke!!! I can still remember it!!



Hahahaha, thats some funny $h1t........

Maybe in a similar situation the plastic bag could be attached to th rear most external part of th vehicle?
i.e. tow ball or back of the trailer? Keeps it ouside with fresh air flowing over it.

[micbec]

Hahahaha, thats some funny $h1t........

Maybe in a similar situation the plastic bag could be attached to th rear most external part of th vehicle?
i.e. tow ball or back of the trailer? Keeps it ouside with fresh air flowing over it.

Go the Wag Bag.

Phillips Products WAG Toilet Bag Kits (12 Pack) - Sale on Outdoors Toilets at the Lonely Planet Gear Shop (http://www.lonelyplanet.com/travel_services/trvl_gear/item/phillips_products_wag_toilet_bag_kits_12_pack.htm)

[Tired Triton]

Has anyone ever thought about fasting for four days before a camping trip, to empty their intestines of the brown stuff? I havent tried it, but just a thought....
Personally, I wonder if my stools are potent enough to throw into my fuel tank, where the fuel would dissolve it and the stool would boost the fuel's octane rating??? The main problem would be trying to get the stool into the 20-cent diameter unleaded fuel tank inlet.....

[luxa]

ROFPML - damn how did I miss this thread until now !!!!

I'm guessing the majority here have never heard of the "pissaphone" - and the porta potty ? that used to consist of a bucket, with a TIGHT fitting lid. Chemicals ??? WTF......

Another Musurain Hunting story, when a mate went for a short nightime walk with no ET. In the morning, doing Observation Lanes what did he happen to kneel in !!! ROFPML...... You got it..... DIG A HOLE.........

These days I'll take the PPotti if we are staying put for a few days, although I always seem to be the lucky bastard emptying it - whilst it the "1-sit/2-sit" crowd that fill the damn thing......

Stay tuned - I'll track down the latest accessory sure to have you all in tears !!!

Luxa

[luxa]

The "Offroad Commode".........

http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a69/luxa/ORC20CAM20BACKGROUND.jpg

"The OffRoad Commode easily attaches to any 2in. receiver hitch and supports up to 500 lbs. The 1 5/16in. dia. steel tube seat is covered with soft, padded camo — ideal for any outdoorsman out in the wild"

PML

Tends to give you a crap exit angle when stuck in the hitch on the 4by !!!!!!

View Advertisement here:

Off Road Commode Video (http://www.metacafe.com/watch/216119/off_road_commode/)


Editors - how about the magazine "get behind" its customers and do a "Bush Facilities - Numer 2 review" in the next mag or Video. "Roothys Camp Stew", in Combination with the "after grog" will surely be a worthy test of ANY mobile facility !!!!!

Luxa

[bruggz351]

Hahahaha, thats some funny $h1t........

Maybe in a similar situation the plastic bag could be attached to th rear most external part of th vehicle?
i.e. tow ball or back of the trailer? Keeps it ouside with fresh air flowing over it.

HAHAHAHAHA!!!! god help the poor buggar traveling behind if the bag comes loose:eek: HAHAHAHA!!

[sudso]

We camped up the Howqua River Rd couple years ago, no place to go with the amount of people there. Couple of long drops or the porta potty, most people all had their own toilet tent things. Now I don't mind long drops BUT I do like to breath while I'm there.
Damn long drops. I have a healthy fear of them since a fishing trip at Butlers Beach on York Peninsula years ago.
I'd dropped my dacs and just about to sit when I noticed a couple of bees in the wraparound tent thing, then it was 2000 of em! In the bloody hole!
Do ya think they woulda been a little pissed if I started crapping all over them and their hive? The thought of my family jewels being attacked by a swarm of bees makes me squeemish.
Why they made a hive in a 10' deep turd hole is beyond me anyway.
I treat long drops with great suspicion now and prefer to be like a bear but dig my own hole.

[luxa]

I hate to think how the Longdrops at Loch Sport are looking these days - I'm guessing the Gippsland Floods would have given them a "Good Flushing".......Down the main st !!!!!!

Luxa

[FJ40.]

I carnt belive this thread is still going!!!!
awesome keep it up

[JemmyBubbles]

On topic..

Hole/snap one off and go from there...

Off topic

Missus and I spent xmas in china and did a fair bit of travelling into some dodgey pretty places out west... one such place was pingyao a really pretty walled city. Being that china in general is fairly cheap we tended to seek accomodation in the nicer establishments, with the benefit being western style bathroom ie: normal sit down bloody toilet.

Given that I hated using the 'stoop to poo' things I tended to hold things in for a few days until I found a real toilet, so the toilet in the guesthouse copped a smashing of massive proportions.

The toilet had like a nice big receptical, much larger than those found here in australia. When it was flushed it kind of filled up with water and then slowly kept filling up, all the while mr brown was bobbing to be set free. We checked out before I could see the aftermath... tbh I really didn't want to.

I destroyed another toilet in Xi'an in much the same way. 7 sages guesthouse to be exact.

China = dodgy toilets.

Greece also... Toilet paper in waste paper basket action Yummy

@ the fella talking about taking piccies of no 2. I'm not going to post the actual link.. but I think ratemypoo dot com actually exists ?

Cheers for the lolz

Jeremy

[Ragster]

Your typical Asian receptacle........

[Crunch]

When my mates said "go find a tree".....


i did.....




http://www.centralcoastmodifiedcars.com/new/forums/uploads/1182572622/med_gallery_4_2_94349.jpg

[bushbashed]

Remember fighting the MAF years ago myself.
Dug a big shit-pit about 50 metres out from the machine gun (why put it inside the perimeter where you eat and sleep?). Enemy did a probe one night and yep, you guessed it, one of them went guts-up into the shitter. Sentries were laughing so much, they couldn't fire the gun! Needless so say there weren't any more probes on our side of the position.

[MOPAR or NO CAR]

Whilst living in the Whitsundays I did alot of boating. If you wanted to go no.2 you could either use the head (pump while you dump) or like myself, wait till night, lean out and relieve yourself over the duck-board. To my luck I have never fallen over as you need a good hand hold because you really need to lean out to miss the duckboard. And then you can stand there and watch it float away in the diminishing light LOL.
I have never used one of those newer 'vacuue flush' toilets on boats (they are like space toilets), I like my leeeean-out method or the old grinder which had the reputation of clogging up easly if you didn't have the impellor that chopped up your business (thats why you don't put hair down a marine head)

I also learnt a thing or two from the charter boat operators, the story goes like this -

How to wipe yourself on a sailboat while using minimal paper as so not to beak the tiolet/save paper.

1. Get 1 sheet of toilet paper and fold it in half, then in half again so you have a small square 1/4 the size of the orininal sheet.

2. Tear off one corner on the small square so that when you unfold the paper there is a finger-sized hole in the middle. Make sure you keep the piece you tore off for later.

3. Slip the piece of paper over one of your fingers and proceed to wipe yourself with your finger.

4. When a satisfactory level of cleanliness is achieved you then pull the paper back off you finger, taking the poo with you.

5. Finally, use the corner of paper you tore off earlier (you did remember to keep didn't you) to clean under you fingernail!

And there you have it, the grotty yachty's way to wiping you bum with one sheet of toilet paper. Try it sometime (seriously don't)

[patchymon]

Damn Musorians.. they are everywhere...

I am happy digging a hole, but dont mind the porta loo. So long as it is early morning and the sun hasnt had a chance to warm it up yet.

I have a mate who went out bush for 9 days (on an exercise) and decided that he wasnt going to dig a hole so he would just hold on. Anyway he managed to go without for the entire time. However the problem being, when he got home he had a big backlog and when it was time it was time. So when it was time to come out it well to put it nicely and without a word of a lie, It tore him a new one. Anyway after a trip to the doctors and a few stitches we have a great warry to talk about on the piss.

I did 6 months in Timor and we had dodgey 44 Gallon drums cut in half.. they stunk to high heaven especially after a day in the tropical sun. But with views like this we could live with it

[Tired Triton]

Whilst living in the Whitsundays I did alot of boating. If you wanted to go no.2 you could either use the head (pump while you dump) or like myself, wait till night, lean out and relieve yourself over the duck-board. To my luck I have never fallen over as you need a good hand hold because you really need to lean out to miss the duckboard. And then you can stand there and watch it float away in the diminishing light LOL.
I have never used one of those newer 'vacuue flush' toilets on boats (they are like space toilets), I like my leeeean-out method or the old grinder which had the reputation of clogging up easly if you didn't have the impellor that chopped up your business (thats why you don't put hair down a marine head)

I also learnt a thing or two from the charter boat operators, the story goes like this -

How to wipe yourself on a sailboat while using minimal paper as so not to beak the tiolet/save paper.

1. Get 1 sheet of toilet paper and fold it in half, then in half again so you have a small square 1/4 the size of the orininal sheet.

2. Tear off one corner on the small square so that when you unfold the paper there is a finger-sized hole in the middle. Make sure you keep the piece you tore off for later.

3. Slip the piece of paper over one of your fingers and proceed to wipe yourself with your finger.

4. When a satisfactory level of cleanliness is achieved you then pull the paper back off you finger, taking the poo with you.

5. Finally, use the corner of paper you tore off earlier (you did remember to keep didn't you) to clean under you fingernail!

And there you have it, the grotty yachty's way to wiping you bum with one sheet of toilet paper. Try it sometime (seriously don't)

So thats how they do it! :( Now I wonder how many sailor's hands I have shook.....

[BMKal]

The "Offroad Commode".........

Editors - how about the magazine "get behind" its customers and do a "Bush Facilities - Numer 2 review" in the next mag or Video. "Roothys Camp Stew", in Combination with the "after grog" will surely be a worthy test of ANY mobile facility !!!!!

Luxa

Just don't give them ideas about doing a comparison on the next DVD. Really don't need to see Roothy giving a live demo.:cry:

[MUDRATGQ]

Gday guys any of you gone to dig what you think is a fresh boghole only to find it's a preeloved hole. lmao

[disco_thrasher]

Gday guys any of you gone to dig what you think is a fresh boghole only to find it's a preeloved hole. lmao
ahhh thee old sleeping land mine

[luxa]

Try this one on a hot day, in a sauna [toilet] tent with all the Dunny Budgies trying to carry you away.......

eBay Australia: Coleman non-flush potable toilet (item 190131983574, end time 21-Jul-07 19:59:38 AEST) (http://cgi.ebay.com.au/Coleman-non-flush-potable-toilet_W0QQitemZ190131983574QQihZ009QQcategoryZ835 53QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem)

Comes with WARRANTY - I'd love to see the store when you return it for a claim !!!

Luxa

[Forseti]

Way back when the Army first thought of "saving the environment" and introduced the "Battle of Portaloo" I was a Section Commander of an APC Sect. We got issued with our very own Porta potti for the section. The looks of bemusement amongst the blokes quickly changed when we all started to wonder where we were going to stow the bloody thing. Any body who has been there will remember there aint much room left in a M113 when you are bombed up and have a section of Grunts on board. Mind you the Grunts usually smelled worse than the WMD. Any way being the Seco I wasnt going to carry it so it quickly go delegated to the lowest dog in the pack - Charlie. My Charlie callsign was crewed by an "interesting" pair of ratbags who strapped the bloody thing to the top of the cargo hatch and piled about 20 coils of barb around it to camoflage it. Stiff shit for the Grunts he was carrying as they were now closed down every where they went. Coupled whith the knowledge that they were sitting under 20 litres of festering shit it wasnt the pick of the rides in the sect. There was some skullduggery with vehicle swaps over the next few months. Any way one day we were working our way up this dirty great yama, I was keeping an eye on my other call signs as I had a new driver in one vehicle and a new Crewie in Charlie. As charlie slid to the bottom of a fairly rough vertical drop 7 -8 feet did a bit of a sprocket dance and went bang into a bloody great rock the WMD became unstrapped, smashed down onto the side of the cuppola and split open showering the crewie in its contents before smacking the driver in the back of the head, this caused his face to smack the ring and opened up his lip, chin and flattened his nose. The vehicle stayed in a near verticle position, nose down. The now bleeding and covered in shit driver shot out of his hole like some thing you have never seen flinging clothes everywhere. the crewie hot on his heels. And all we could here were the screams of the Grunts still locked in the back as the remnants dribbled into the cuppola. I cant recall ever having laughed so hard.

[luxa]

Forseti - you might relate to this one.....

Mate had to go #1 whilst locked down [livefire advance]. So out came the faithful cups canteen (used for everything from a wash, shave, #1's when not otherwise convenient - then a brew [coffee] at the end of the day!!!).
At the first opportunity he turfed it up out the hatch - and the wind gave the crewy a lovely warm shower !!!!!

Luxa

[Forseti]

Forseti - you might relate to this one.....

Mate had to go #1 whilst locked down [livefire advance]. So out came the faithful cups canteen (used for everything from a wash, shave, #1's when not otherwise convenient - then a brew [coffee] at the end of the day!!!).
At the first opportunity he turfed it up out the hatch - and the wind gave the crewy a lovely warm shower !!!!!

Luxa


Yup

If it happened at Pucca the crewie might have been gratefull. Anything for a bit of wamth.

[Forseti]

Over in that "other place" some tribes of tutsi mix up a brew of blood and piss from their cattle and dye their hair with it and drink it whilst its still warm. Gives them the POWER OF THE BULL for when the goes a huntin.

[trogladite]

If your in a rush and forgot the shovel just look for a rabbit hole, the rabbits dont seem to mind, at least none have complained yet. Just burn your paper and push the load into the hole with lots of sand. Only use this method in case of emergency.

[Chriso]

Way back when the Army first thought of "saving the environment" and introduced the "Battle of Portaloo" I was a Section Commander of an APC Sect. We got issued with our very own Porta potti for the section. The looks of bemusement amongst the blokes quickly changed when we all started to wonder where we were going to stow the bloody thing. Any body who has been there will remember there aint much room left in a M113 when you are bombed up and have a section of Grunts on board. Mind you the Grunts usually smelled worse than the WMD. Any way being the Seco I wasnt going to carry it so it quickly go delegated to the lowest dog in the pack - Charlie. My Charlie callsign was crewed by an "interesting" pair of ratbags who strapped the bloody thing to the top of the cargo hatch and piled about 20 coils of barb around it to camoflage it. Stiff shit for the Grunts he was carrying as they were now closed down every where they went. Coupled whith the knowledge that they were sitting under 20 litres of festering shit it wasnt the pick of the rides in the sect. There was some skullduggery with vehicle swaps over the next few months. Any way one day we were working our way up this dirty great yama, I was keeping an eye on my other call signs as I had a new driver in one vehicle and a new Crewie in Charlie. As charlie slid to the bottom of a fairly rough vertical drop 7 -8 feet did a bit of a sprocket dance and went bang into a bloody great rock the WMD became unstrapped, smashed down onto the side of the cuppola and split open showering the crewie in its contents before smacking the driver in the back of the head, this caused his face to smack the ring and opened up his lip, chin and flattened his nose. The vehicle stayed in a near verticle position, nose down. The now bleeding and covered in shit driver shot out of his hole like some thing you have never seen flinging clothes everywhere. the crewie hot on his heels. And all we could here were the screams of the Grunts still locked in the back as the remnants dribbled into the cuppola. I cant recall ever having laughed so hard.
HA HA HA, man that is funny as! I can relate to that so much as I spent heaps of time in the back of those bloody cam coloured cabs, my father in law was also in 3/4 Cav. I can just see the driver with his drivers chin covered in Shi7.
Man I am happy that everyone is getting a good laugh out of this thread...keep up the good work boys.

[FrankS]

Somebody help meeeeee a dingo just ate my bowel baby


hahahahahahahahaaaaahhhhhaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!
FireTroll, You get my award for the best Post on this sh!tty subject, hilarious, Regards Frank.

[Rodeoman]

We borrowed a porta-loo once but didn’t see the point. Reason is towards the end of our trip it meant digging a hole and emptying some fermented goodies down a deep hole. Then have to clean the porta-loo once home.

After this experience we went back to out toilet chair (one with the hole in the middle) Reason is we still had to dig a hole, plus no cleaning then we got home.

We are lucky as we mainly go camping in the quiet periods or more remote places, so it makes the toilet experience easier. Nothing worse than trying to find a quiet spot with people camped all around.

But people who don’t dig holes to do the business, are just rude.